I've complicated things again..
If i wasnt so easily shaken by that minor excitement and thought or jealousy,
it wouldnt have happened.
Im back to square one..
Is it my own fault for not being grownup enough to think in the shoes of my parents ?
Must be so..
They give me all the best they could afford,
but im still asking for more.
What do i want ?
Silly me..
Being envious of others when i was certain i might not be able to fulfill this stupid 'dream' in the first place.
Should just kick off the thought and continue on..
I wonder why im feeling so upset though..
It has never been so bad.
Maybe..
Maybe im just feeling loserish to be lagging behind them.. Not keeping up with them..
& yet again, my heart's asking myself why im not rich.
But again, my head's telling myself it's not worth it.
Whatever.
Everything seems complicated again.
& my MP3's earpiece just had to breakdown at this time.
Im going to get a new one, or maybe the problem lies on the MP3 itself.
Which i hope not.

Whatever.

Yesterday and today resurrected the old thoughts i had in primary school.
Which was idiotic to an extent, but in order to keep myself safe just in case.
And that is to..
Never fall in love.
Yah, but this kind of thing isnt what you can control and restrict yourself to.
Emotions.. Feelings..
Saw so many people breaking down because of these problems.
Though some might not have,
they may be facing problems.
Today, saw a Chinese programme on the TV.
It was about the old man hitting on by / with the China women in Chinatown.
There was also an interview with an old lady whose husband went to have an affair with a China women even after he is married for 60+ years.
The old women is so pathetic.
Guys are jerks.
I quite liked the ending of that programme.
在許下承諾的那瞬間，站在你旁邊的人，真的是你的摯愛嗎？
Ok, maybe it isnt the actual one, but it's something like that.
Love is unknown, alien, but sweet.
But apparently, it doesnt last in the long run..
Even if it does, it wouldnt be easy to keep it going.
Moreover, we dont really see much successful marriages now.
Quarrels, arguments..
I'd rather not..

Im practically not studying for MCQs already.
Physics is no-hope kind.
He said it.
Im not feeling upset about it myself.
Just sorry that i've disappointed him.
Well, maybe he isnt the first one i've disappointed..
Heck.
Finishing off AMaths 10papers already.
But im currently deciding to slack and chiong only starting from tomorrow.
Hate myself !
The others must be studying now..
*Sighs..

The FB quiz said that im sociable and many people loves me.
LOLs.
That is another thing i've been thinking about.
I have relatively high social skills, must admit.
But not to the extent of everyone loving me.
Plus, i dont even talk to some people.
That's yet another mystery.
Either it has something to do with my retarded character or sense of humor.
Imagine sarcasm as humorous.
That's who i am.
Haha.
But it has been consecutively predicted in several quizzes.
Is it really me that is having problems understanding myself,
or is it because the quizzes are really inaccurate ?
Sians.
I miss my exclassmates.
I miss Marymount friends.
I miss school.
& im officially insane.
Imagine finding satisfaction in doing maths when im such a sucker at maths.
Now that's BAD.
Real bad.
Or maybe not.
Must be the nerves...
Fullstop. Stop crapping ~

I've complicated things again..
If i wasnt so easily shaken by that minor excitement and thought or jealousy,
it wouldnt have happened.
Im back to square one..
Is it my own fault for not being grownup enough to think in the shoes of my parents ?
Must be so..
They give me all the best they could afford,
but im still asking for more.
What do i want ?
Silly me..
Being envious of others when i was certain i might not be able to fulfill this stupid 'dream' in the first place.
Should just kick off the thought and continue on..
I wonder why im feeling so upset though..
It has never been so bad.
Maybe..
Maybe im just feeling loserish to be lagging behind them.. Not keeping up with them..
& yet again, my heart's asking myself why im not rich.
But again, my head's telling myself it's not worth it.
Whatever.
Everything seems complicated again.
& my MP3's earpiece just had to breakdown at this time.
Im going to get a new one, or maybe the problem lies on the MP3 itself.
Which i hope not.

Whatever.

Yesterday and today resurrected the old thoughts i had in primary school.
Which was idiotic to an extent, but in order to keep myself safe just in case.
And that is to..
Never fall in love.
Yah, but this kind of thing isnt what you can control and restrict yourself to.
Emotions.. Feelings..
Saw so many people breaking down because of these problems.
Though some might not have,
they may be facing problems.
Today, saw a Chinese programme on the TV.
It was about the old man hitting on by / with the China women in Chinatown.
There was also an interview with an old lady whose husband went to have an affair with a China women even after he is married for 60+ years.
The old women is so pathetic.
Guys are jerks.
I quite liked the ending of that programme.
在許下承諾的那瞬間，站在你旁邊的人，真的是你的摯愛嗎？
Ok, maybe it isnt the actual one, but it's something like that.
Love is unknown, alien, but sweet.
But apparently, it doesnt last in the long run..
Even if it does, it wouldnt be easy to keep it going.
Moreover, we dont really see much successful marriages now.
Quarrels, arguments..
I'd rather not..

Im practically not studying for MCQs already.
Physics is no-hope kind.
He said it.
Im not feeling upset about it myself.
Just sorry that i've disappointed him.
Well, maybe he isnt the first one i've disappointed..
Heck.
Finishing off AMaths 10papers already.
But im currently deciding to slack and chiong only starting from tomorrow.
Hate myself !
The others must be studying now..
*Sighs..

The FB quiz said that im sociable and many people loves me.
LOLs.
That is another thing i've been thinking about.
I have relatively high social skills, must admit.
But not to the extent of everyone loving me.
Plus, i dont even talk to some people.
That's yet another mystery.
Either it has something to do with my retarded character or sense of humor.
Imagine sarcasm as humorous.
That's who i am.
Haha.
But it has been consecutively predicted in several quizzes.
Is it really me that is having problems understanding myself,
or is it because the quizzes are really inaccurate ?
Sians.
I miss my exclassmates.
I miss Marymount friends.
I miss school.
& im officially insane.
Imagine finding satisfaction in doing maths when im such a sucker at maths.
Now that's BAD.
Real bad.
Or maybe not.
Must be the nerves...
Fullstop. Stop crapping ~

♥ CHERYL - (:
I'm an authentic Earthling.
& that's all about me. (;